Anything but Green
by BoxingKing
Summary: Drabble about going Green, Dean style. :


Anything but Green

BoxingKing

Supernatural – it does not, of course, belong to me

XXX

Dean belched, grunted, and crushed the empty can in his fist, eyes haphazardly on the road as he mumbled along to Alice Cooper's "Poison".

Sam slanted his eyes at Dean and gave an internal sigh. "Charming."

Dean grinned and looked over at his brother. "Aw, Sammy, don't be that way. It's just my way of complimenting the fare."

"Yeah, you and Shrek."

"Hey, that was a great movie."

Sam rolled his eyes once more.

"You know, a third one is supposed to be coming out. Think it'll hit the theatres?"

"We're not going even if it does."

"Aw, come on, it'd be fun."

"Dean, please."

"Fine, fine." Dean glanced at Sammy. "Killjoy." Sam didn't feel the need to respond.

Dean shook his head and gave the can one final tap on the steering wheel before chucking it out the window.

Sam's head whipped up from his laptop. "Dean!"

"What?" Dean tried for the innocent expression.

"You know, there's this new thing where people are going green. Trying to save the planet, recycling, NOT littering."

"Psh, as if we follow trends."

Sam glared at Dean. "It's not a trend, Dean. It's a real issue, one you should be taking into account."

"Sammy, please, it's not like we're not busy saving the world."

"Dean! It's not like it takes a lot of effort. All you need to do is chuck it into the back seat instead. We can pick it up at the next gas station."

"And get spill on my seats? You've got to be joking." Dean shook his head. As if.

"Dean, we could really make a difference out there."

"You act like we don't make a difference now."

"Oh yeah, how many trees have you planted lately?"

"You're missing the big picture, Sammy. We take care of the nasty monsters just waiting to abduct people. They probably litter in their spare time, leaving bones every which way, so killing them off probably makes a real difference. Imagine all the bones that instead make their way to the dump… or grave."

"Dude, bones are biodegradable."

"Oh yeah, but how long does it take? Huh? Everyone complains about how long plastic and crap takes, so how about bones? I bet nature doesn't want those in her playground."

Sam looked at his brother in a kind of dumbfounded shock. Finally, he shook his head and turned back to his research.

Dean looked at his brother, and tried to salvage his image. "And hey, besides, technically we're being un-green by killing the monsters."

Sam gave his brother a disbelieving look. "Oh, and how do you figure?"

"If the monsters kill the people, and the people are the ones that litter, than technically the monsters are nature's brooms or something. The monsters are the ones that probably have like the smallest footprint, since they kill off the bad animals on the planet."

Sam looked at Dean.

"Eh, see, I'm not the only one littering. You are in fact promoting littering." Dean grinned at Sam.

Finally, after a beat of silence, Sam responded. "I'm surprised you actually knew we had footprints."

"Tch, of course I knew. I do pay attention, you know. Hydrogen foot prints and all that."

Sam grinned. "Yeah, and all that."

"And besides, we probably have a small one anyways. We don't have a permanent residence, and we don't buy a lot of crap. We use gas and ammo and stuff, but houses and furniture take a lot. You know what I'm saying?"

Dean was nodding along with his own speech.

"And besides, we pick up all our spent shells. We don't leave a trace behind."

Sam smiled. "That's not being green, that's being marine."

"Well, same dif, right?"

Sam shook his head. "This conversation was futile, wasn't it?"

Dean shook his head at his brother. "Of course not. Now that you've realized the error of your ways, you can stop promoting littering. Shame on you." He glared at his brother. "Tsk, tsk."

With a quick grin he continued, "And besides, I have you to pick up after me. Who needs green?"

XXX

FIN

XXX

I had this little drabble just pop into my head and not want to go away! First one outside of anime, so everyone let me know what you think. In my heart, I try to think that Dean would not litter… Yeah, right. I would LOVE to believe that he also knew what he was talking about. Sadly, I can actually imagine this conversation taking place between them.  Anyways, hope you enjoyed! ~BK


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